Debating online dating
When I am committed to them and act nice and devoted, they start to look elsewhere. Am I cursed to be alone just because I know how to be kind to women? So how is it that all these successful men are not connecting with all these successful women? Because there’s much more going on than merely a meeting of the minds. The flip side of being analytical is being difficult. The flip side of having moral clarity is being arrogant.
When the partner pulls away because he doesn’t want to be with someone so critical, the “direct” person concludes that he couldn’t appreciate her “honesty.” If this makes you feel personally indicted, welcome to the club. I write things that are, to say the least, provocative…and yet I always get surprised when I receive angry emails from readers. And if you’re trying to win each argument, you can’t be too shocked if he wants a woman who can be a little more acquiescent. What she doesn’t acknowledge is that despite her impressive credentials – attractive, successful, intelligent – she might not be giving men what THEY WANT. Just someone who makes his life EASIER and more pleasant. You are a go-getter and worthy of everyone’s respect. And with a generation of women who pose questions like “Are Men Necessary?
When a man goes out with a woman, he’s not as concerned with whether she’s articulate and on track to make partner at the law firm. Listen, I’ve spent my life chasing after women I’ve intellectually admired. They’re not wrong for seeing things I could change. But if that go-getter side ends up emasculating your man, or makes him feel insignificant, or second-guessed, he’s not really getting what he wants out of a partner. ” it’s pretty difficult for us to enjoy our role as men.
That’s what women want in men and they assume it’s of equal importance to them. Men DO value intelligence, but they also want from their girlfriend what they CAN’T get from their business associates. If he finds himself constantly hearing all the things he needs to change, he may just determine that he wants a bright woman who is less challenging. But a huge reason I’m with my wife is because she spends her time loving and supporting me, not challenging me on everything from movie tickets, to travel plans, to wake up times. This doesn’t mean you should play dumb, or be weak and needy, no more than the nice guy should start acting like a jackass.
There are some meetings I can go into and run the show, and others where I have to be subordinate.
So I knew if I could learn how to do that professionally and make a success of myself, that I could learn that personally too.